


Bad Switch Trio

by alecisnoonesbitch



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: BFT Bootcamp, BFT kids impersonate them, Canada is a surprisingly good actor, Gen, Germany too, Lovi tries, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:59:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27583052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alecisnoonesbitch/pseuds/alecisnoonesbitch
Summary: The BFT is bored. When they get the chance to make their younger counterparts (Canada, South Italy, and Germany) do one dare, they decide to put them through BFT Bootcamp. The world will never be the same. Rated T for Language and sexual themes, rating may go up.
Relationships: TO BE DETERMINED - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	1. Scusi?

**Author's Note:**

> Translations:
> 
> Ich bin gelangweilt - I am bored
> 
> Moi aussi and Yo tambien - Me too
> 
> Manner - Men
> 
> pauvre de moi - woe is me
> 
> ma vie - my life
> 
> muy buenos tomates - very good tomatoes
> 
> mon précieux Mathieu! Mon être cher préféré - My precious Matthew! My favourite loved one!
> 
> les Etas Unis - The United States
> 
> Espagne - Spain
> 
> Others are mainly generic well known stuff or endearments.

Three friends sit on a couch in France, wide awake, yet stagnant. There is a world meeting in mere hours, but none of them have ever paid much mind to preparation- at least not for world meetings.

"Ich bin gelangweilt."

"Yo también."

"Moi aussi."

"Ve should-"

"-go to a bar-"

"-et find some belle filles?"

"Or männer. I don't discrminate."

"We did that yesterday, and the day before."

"Go bother Roddy und Lizzy?"

"Neither of us care about them."

"Hire some strippers?"

"OH MON DIEU! PAUVRE DE MOI! I 'ave never 'ad to pay for amour in MA VIE!"

"Why don't we go visit a whole bunch of-"

"-BEDROOMS-"

"-greenhouses, and we can see if they grow muy buenos tomates!"

BBRRRRRRIIIIIINNNGGG!

"That is mine, oh how I hope it is Angleterre! 'Allo? Ah, mon précieux Mathieu! Mon être cher préféré! What can I help you with?" Francis leaves the room as he continues in french.

"He doesn't sound very sad. I thought he said he wanted it to be the scone bastard!" the southern Italian stirs and both of the remaining BFT members look at Antonio's chest in surprise. They had forgotten that Romano had been napping there.

Antonio shakes off the shock and answers his precious child, "He always says that even though it isn't true. I mean even Francis doesn't enjoy getting yelled at hatefully by his friend."

"Besides, who could be sad if Birdie called them? He is too cute to be sad around!"

"Yah!" Antonio agreed, "Absolutamente adorable! Almost as cute as you, mi pequeño!" Lovino huffed.

"Who the fuck is Birdie?"

"Canada!"

"Matthew!"

"Mon amour!" Francis re-entered the room, "don't worry! Papa Francis shall take care of it!" he hung up and perched gracefully on the arm of the sofa.

"Vat is it?"

"Well, mon Mathieu and petite Ludwig were playing pool against les États Unis et Veneziano and they lost."

"HAH! Stupid potato bastard! serves him right!"

"So why did he need to call you?"

"It seems that Mathieu and his frère had made a bet. Since Mathieu and Ludwig lost, Ludwig has to do any dare that Prusse comes up with and Mathieu has to one from me."

"Awwwwww, why don't I get to come up with a dare for my pequeño tomate?"

"I am just surprised that they got Luddy to play pool with them when the meeting is tomorrow."

Francis' eyebrows scrunched up charmingly. "I think we should make them do a dare together. The question is, what should their dare be?"

Antonio pouted, "I want to dare Lovi to do something!"

Francis glanced at his Spanish friend and then smirked tastefully, "Lovino probably wouldn't have been able to do the dare anyway, he simply doesn't have the skills!"

"I have more skills than anyone! Especially that potato bastard and- and..." Lovino trailed off in confusion.

"Mathieu?"

"SI!"

"I am afraid that I don't believe you. I simply don't think that you can act!"

"ACT! Of course I can act! Italians invented opera you stupido!

"Ah, but this is very different from l'Opera, ma petite Italienne! It is something you do not have the temperament for."

"TEMPERAMENT? I AM A PERFECT, SKILLED, GOOD-AT-ACTING, ANGEL! I DO NOT HAVE A TEMPER! I WILL SHOW YOU! I WILL DO THE DARE A HUNDRED TIMES BETTER THAN THOSE IDIOTAS!"

"Bien, you will be Espagne then."

"Scusi?"


	2. Langer Tag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BFT Bootcamp HAS BEGUN! First up, Provocative Waltzing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:
> 
> Parfait reactiones - Perfect reactions!
> 
> Allons-y - Let's go
> 
> Kleiner Bruder - little brother
> 
> Dies wird ein langer Tag - This is going to be a long day.

"Wait, wait, wait," Canada said raising his hands.

The BFT had gathered their _petite unes_ all together this morning, 24 hours before the world meeting. They had planned frantically, throwing together criteria, supplies, scenarios, and challenges for the dare they had planned. The three younger nations stared dumbfoundedly.

" **We** can't be the Bad Friends Trio. **You're** the Bad Friends Trio!"

"We are not asking for you to replace us! _As if!"_ France reassured, whispering the last part, "we are simply seeing if you can act enough like us to unnerve the other nations! It would be amusing, non?"

"There is NEIN VAY you can replace us anyway! We are far too gorgeous und awesome to be mistaken for young upstarts! Especially you lo-lo, you have too much bad attitude, you would be better off impersonating England!" Prussia yelled prussianly (see: awesomely), "see! you are so unawesome that your nickname isn't even capitalized when I say it! Even stuck up Luddy and weak Kleiner Birdie get capitalized nicknames! KESESESESESE! Who's the _stupido_ now, huh? KESESESESESESESE!"

"Lo-lo" did not yell. He did not curse, he just sat there smiling innocently, although death was in his eyes and you could see him struggling not to react. Canada wasn't putdown or sad, he simply raised an eyebrow superiorly and elegantly, eyes cold. Germany, likewise, didn't get mad or sigh exasperatedly, he just smirked and leant back in the wooden rocking chair he occupied, almost falling over.

The BFT surveyed all this and then smiled, France checking off something on a list.

" _Parfait reactiones!_ We are off to a great start! _Allons-y!_ We must continue to the second lesson!" None of the three younger were surprised it had been a test, Prussia would never insult his _Kleiner Bruder_.

France grabbed Germany, Spain grabbed Canada and Prussia grabbed South Italy, who was trying very hard not to beat the shit out of the Prussian. They had all come to the wise decision to not mentor their own charges, after all, glory is better observed from afar. They would look better if the younger could not look too closely. (hah, bet you thought they had decided to do that so that they could get an unbiased objective view! NOPE!)

* * *

"Official Lesson Numero Uno! Provocative waltzing!" Spain stood at the forefront of, you guessed it, a ballroom. One of the three ballrooms in France's most luxurious Parisian manor. This particular ballroom was done completely in silver, white and blue; it was France's favourite.

"Oui, provocative waltzing, in this case, provocative meaning seductive," France explained.

"Provocative Waltzing? Childs play! I **walk** seductively!" Mathieu asserted gracefully, nose in the air, everything down to his name in perfect french form.

"Why waltz? Why not salsa, or cha cha? Spanish dancing is the most seductive after all!" Lovino said in a Spanish accent, though the grimace on his face at saying it ruined the effect.

"Da Awesome Me is not whatever long boring p-word you said. Da Awesome Me is SEXY!" Ludwig yelled, blushing horribly.

"Gah! Deduct points from Luddy! I do too know what... provackitives mean." Prussia said angrily.

"Mi amigo, it is provocative-"

"I know that! I vaz just testing jou all," Prussia insisted, accent getting more pronounced the harder he sulked.

France clapped his hands together regally and his personal violin player stepped out from the corner and began playing The Merry Widows Waltz.

"When you dance seductively, you can not rely on a sexy song. You must be able to know how to be seductive with any soundtrack. _Observer_." France then started waltzing with Spain and Prussia started waltzing with himself, switching between leading and following surprisingly gracefully.

" _Dies wird ein langer Tag_." Germany sighed to himself as he watched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry for another super short chapter. Just wanted to publish something. Hope you are all liking the story and thank you to those who commented, whether on here or on fanfiction.net!


	3. ç'est quoi cette putain de merde.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dancing, Spain is pretty cool'tually

They had been watching their elders waltz for half an hour. None of them had known that you could play the Widow's Waltz for that long. Francis' personal violin player looked agitated when the BFT finally stopped. The elder three were out of breath and trying to hide it; they weren't as young as they used to be.

"And that is how you waltz!" Francis said, with a sophisticated hand flourish that Matthew studied closely.

"..."

"See?! They are so thoroughly seduced that they are speechless! _Espagne_ , we were _Magnifique_! _Prusse_... you were vaguely... awesome as you say, if odd." Francis gushed, looking at gilbert with the smallest hint of french superiority. The disdain did not really make sense since: Gilbert was probably the best waltzer in the room, H-he had managed to look the most elegant and skilled despite dancing with himself, and Francis was the worst out of the three but, frogs be frogs, eh?

Ludwig looked relieved, as it seemed that there was no way that the BFT would make them dance now.

_*CLAPS WITH SPANISH FLAIR SOUND THROUGHOUT THE AIR*_

"Alright, little ones, time for you to..." Antonio twirls three times, does a double front handspring and slides seven feet on his knees across the huge, wooden ballroom floor to stop in front of the Canadian, "...DANCE!" He had a rose in his mouth suddenly, so it seems that it is not only France who can summon romance out of thin air.

Matthew took the proffered hand of his mentor and as soon as Antonio stood, they were off. Mentors and mentees paired off until all three pairs were dancing. They soon realized that the 2 best dancers in there were paired together (Romano and Gilbert).

" _Mis compañeros_ ," Antonio started, "Perhaps we should split you two up, Mateo and I are both even, being the middle in our groups, but I think that the best of one group should be paired with the worst of another. Lovi, _chico_ , why don't you partner with _Francisco y Gilberto_ teach your _hermanito_ , okay?"

Gilbert and Lovino acquiesced, surprisingly, and switched partners, although Lovino didn't enjoy being close to France.

"OK Luddy, step back with your right foot, no your right, and then move your left foot across and slide..."

"You are pretty good at this, Mateo! Who taught you? _¡Ay!_ No, no, _está bien!_ We all make mistakes, you are doing great."

"You suck, B _astardo di Vino_!"

By the end of the Dance Hour (which had mostly been taken up by watching the BFT dance in the beginning), all of them were dancing decently, even Ludwig. Although, Ludwig had had the best teacher; Gilbert was very patient and helpful when he wanted to be.

* * *

"Official lesson _Nummer Zwei_! Eating Foods SEXILY! Though, I do admit that it's hard to be considered sexy when I am in the same room!"

"Because your face ruins their aphro-tite?" Antonio asked innocently.

"I will bite you."

"Mademoiselles, Kink-atering isn't until _Leçon numéro sept_!" Francis scolded playfully.

" _ç'est quoi cette putain de merde."_ Matthew was losing his faith in his Papa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I learned that OK is actually german and that Gilbert's Spanish form is literally just Gilberto lol. Ok so Translations:
> 
> y - and
> 
> hermanito - little brother
> 
> the Ay with 2 !'s - ouch
> 
> esta bien - it's okay
> 
> Bastardo di Vino - Wine Bastard
> 
> Nummer Zwei - Number 2
> 
> Leçon numéro sept - Lesson number 7
> 
> "ç'est quoi cette putain de merde." -"what the fuck is this shit."
> 
> Yeah, I speak only Low German, but Both Germans are depicted as speaking High German so I used that to the best of my abilities. I know basic French and Spanish so I try my best not to use google translate. If anyone has any corrections, feel free to correct me. On anything, not just translations.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Ah yes, another fic among many unfinished fanfics. I was acting some scenes out in my head when I realized they could make a fanfic. SOOOOOO, ya.


End file.
